Rap Lyrics Translated / Rapping For Dummies / How to Rap for Dummies

Notorious B.I.G One more Chance rap lyrics translated. Have Fun.


Lyrics:

First things first, I poppa, freaks all the honeys

Dummies - playboy bunnies, those wantin’ money

Those the ones I like ‘cause they don’t get nathan’

But penetration, unless it smells like sanitation

Garbage, I turn like doorknobs

Heart throb, never, black and ugly as ever

However, I stay coochied down to the socks

Rings and watch filled with rocks

TRANSLATION:

As a general rule, I perform deviant sexual acts with women of all kinds, including but not limited to those with limited intellect, nude magazine models, and prostitutes. I particularly enjoy sexual encounters with the latter group as they are generally disappointed in the fact that they only receive penile intercourse and nothing more, unless of course, they douche on a consistent basis. Although I am extremely unattractive, I am able to engage in these types of sexual acts with some regularity. Perhaps my sexuality is somehow related to my fancy and expensive jewelry.


Lyrics:

And my jam knock in the Mitsubishi

Girls pee pee when they see me, Nava-hoes creep me in they tee pee

As I lay down laws like I lay carpet

Stop it - if you think your gonna make a profit

TRANSLATION:

I enjoy playing my music loudly on my car stereo. Apparently, women enjoy this also because they become sexually aroused when they see me driving. Oddly enough, when I visit the Native American reservations, some of the more sexually promiscuous Indian women attempt to seduce me in their homes. Their intent is to divest me of my earnings. Such actions are unacceptable.


Lyrics:

Don’t see my ones, don’t see my guns - get it

Now tell ya friends Poppa hit it then split it

In two as I flow with the Junior Mafia

I don’t know what the hell’s stoppin’ ya

I’m clockin’ ya - Versace shades watchin’ ya

Once ya grin, I’m in game, begin

TRANSLATION:

Understand this fact: you can have neither my money, nor my weapons. I suggest that you inform your peers that we engaged in violent sexual acts. Currently, I am rapping with my associates, the Junior Mafia. I’m having some difficulty understanding why you refuse to approach me. I am attempting to make eye contact with you through my expensive glasses, and as soon as you respond with a smile, I will approach you.


Lyrics:

First I talk about how I dress and this

And diamond necklaces - stretch Lexuses

The sex is just immaculate from the back I get

Deeper and deeper - help ya reach the

Climax that your man can’t make

Call and tell him you’ll be home real late

Let’s sing the break

TRANSLATION:

I prefer to open the conversation with light banter about my wardrobe and jewelry, then I like to discuss my collection of expensive cars. This is more than enough to convince you to have sexual intercourse with me. I am able to insert my penis further into you when I enter you from behind. Furthermore, you will be able to reach orgasm. I understand this to be a problem with your current sexual partner. He needn’t be concerned about your whereabouts. Please phone him and inform him that you won’t be home for a while. By the way, please sing the chorus of the song for me also.


Lyrics:

She’s sick of that song on how it’s so long

Thought he worked his until I handled my biz

There I is - major pain like Damon Wayans

Low down dirty even like his brother Keenan

Schemin’ - don’t bring your girl ‘round me

True player for real, ask Puff Daddy

TRANSLATION:

Your current love interest no longer wishes to hear your fabrications about the length of your member. After I had sexual intercourse with your woman, she became enlightened as to the proper way it is supposed to be performed; violently and immorally. It would be in your best interest to keep your woman away from me as my sexual prowess is very strong. If you are unconvinced, ask Puff Daddy.


Lyrics:

You - ringin’ bells with bags from Chanel

Baby Benz, traded in your Hyundai Excel

Fully equipped, CD changer with the cell

She beeped me, meet me at twelve

TRANSLATION:

Despite the fact that you attempted to win her at her doorstep with bags full of expensive clothes and a car (the lower end model Mercedes Benz which you financed by signing over your current vehicle) containing an expensive stereo and a cellular phone, your woman has contacted me through my pager indicating that we should rendezvous at midnight.


Lyrics:

Where you at? Flippin’ jobs, playin’ car notes?

While I’m swimmin’ in ya women like the breast stroke

Right stroke, left stroke what’s the best stroke

Death stroke - tongue all down her throat

Nuthin’ left to do but send her home to you

I’m through - can ya sing the song for me, boo?

TRANSLATION:

You, on the other hand, jump from job to job, barely able to maintain payments on the Mercedes Benz you purchased for your woman. Meanwhile, I continue to engage in sexual intercourse and commit lewd osculatory acts with your women. My only remaining option is to request that she leave my home and return to you because I have reached orgasm and no longer have a need for her presence.


Lyrics:

So, what’s it gonna be? Him or me?

We can cruise the world with pearls

Gator boots for girls

The envy of all women, crushed linen

Cartier wrist-wear with diamonds in ‘em

The finest women I love with a passion

Ya man’s a wimp, I give that ass a good thrashin’

TRANSLATION:

The ultimate decision rests with you. Whom do you choose as your sexual partner. I can take you on cruises around the world. I will dress you in the finest jewelry and footwear. You will be envied by women worldwide in your fine clothes and jewelry. There is a special place in my heart for beautiful women. I will defeat your man in an altercation because he is effeminate.


Lyrics:

High fashion - flyin’ into all states.

Sexin’ me while your man masturbates.

Isn’t this great? Your flight leaves at eight.

Her flight lands at nine, my game just rewinds.

Lyrically I’m supposed to represent.

I’m not only the client, I’m the player president

TRANSLATION:

You will be dressed in finest clothes on the runways of Paris. I will fly you to every state to shop for fine clothes and jewelry. You will enjoy sexual intercourse with me and your man will be forced to pleasure himself through manual stimulation. What a life! I’ll return you to LaGuardia in time to catch your 8 o’clock flight. The timing is perfect because I have scheduled a date with a second woman who arrives at the same gate at 9 o’clock. I’ll seduce her in the same way that I seduced you. I rap well and I am a positive reflection of my home town. Not only am I a sexually deviant, misogynistic, immoral, wealthy, male prostitute, but I also sit on the board of directors of the organization that governs others of my kind.

from funny.co.uk

Rap Lyrics Translated / Rapping For Dummies / How to Rap for Dummies

159 comments:

AvMan said...

HO - LEE crap that was funny.

media_lush said...

nice job....hope you don't mind if I screengrab a few and post them on my site (I'll credit this site)

Your Host said...

Thank you for bringing rap to the rest of us.

Keith said...

Hehehe Funny...

Nice job...

wolfy said...

I knew it...Rap is all crap.

fatguy24 said...

this was actually submitted as a school assignment for an ebonics class in california (oakland high school) when ebonics was considered a course a few years back.

Sean said...

There's a funnier disection of this elsewhere.

And by the way, the ebonics class bit is a joke.

http://www.snopes.com/politics/humor/raplyrics.asp

Sean said...

Actually, I should clarify. There was a music review site that did the same thing with some popular rap songs of the time.

I think the choices of songs were more amusing.

Heather said...

Too, too funny. Must share this with others. I'll link it, naturally. :)

Heather said...

Too, too funny. Must share this with others. I'll link it, naturally. :)

Cooler said...

Thank you for copying me with such charm:

PopoZao translated

Ollie said...

That is extremely funny, however, it is also a sad commentary of the rapper mentality and to those who subscribe to it.

Ollie said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Solar John said...

Don't rappers think about anything other than bling, cars, and rough sex with someone else's woman?

krmagley said...

this is funny, but should by no means be used as proof all rap is crap and people who listen to it are idiots. you could do this with any musical genre. you don't think there are one-dimensional and crappy lyrics in rock, punk or country? notice there are no mos def, talib kweli or nas lyrics posted. or would lyrics from a pulitzer prize winner (nas) not display the type of ignorance you all want to expect from all rap music.

brande said...

LOVE LOVE LOVE IT!

ace said...

yea, hilarious. making fun of the deviant morality and poor english command of some popular rap lyrics. i'm rolling laughing, yes, anyone who would enjoy this music now is such a jackass, it's way worse than Iron man by black sabaath, more sexually suggestive than any blues song written in the 50's and 60's and dumber than say, the late beatles.yes, let's poke fun at rappers. too bad all your kids want to be them.

J Stroud said...

krmagley
Nas has never won a Pulitzer Prize. The only mention of this was some self-promoting blather in one of his own songs.

Personally, it's the self-promoting BS that annoys me. Yeah yeah, you're the Terminator. Yeah, you own an Escalade. How relavent that makes you in the world. How important. How meaningful. Brag brag brag.

-vomit-

Brandon said...

I think the self promoting is better then the whiny-feel-sorry-for-me crap in popular rock.

This is pretty funny. I think it is a shame that people refuse to give hip-hop a try though simply because they are incorrectly convinced that all rap is as shallow as this. Although it is also important to note that this is being done with a sense of humor. It's funny because the writer of the song intended it to be funny.

Casey said...

To solar john and all others who question the validity of "rap".
Don't rappers think about anything other than bling, cars, and rough sex with someone else's woman?

Yes they do, they obviously think about rapping for one, and honestly, when you're not thinking about essential life functions, I would assume most american male thoughts to turn to bling, cars and sex with other people's women. Look at Maxim, Playboy, Cribs, any reality show, the entire entertainment industry for examples of what people all over the world think about.

Amaya said...

I love it!

Anarchist Grouch said...

Heh, so most rap amounts to "Lookie at me! I'm cool! I own fancy things and do things with girls!" Yes, yes, we get the picture. Warlords and cargo cults of America.

Makes you wonder about whatever happened to the good political rap that actually scared the establishment instead of propping it up.

LionBull said...

It was funny although it is very simplistic. Rap is a genre with many different and varied styles. So the author and the posters who seem to think this is representative of all rap have never taken the chance to understand the real issues.

Anonymous said...

The people who take this as a serious commentary on rap might be funnier than the actual piece itself. It's like pointing out how absurd it is to chant "I want to hold your hand" about a thousand times in a song, and concluding that the Beatles must have sucked.

Eric B. said...

"It's like pointing out how absurd it is to chant "I want to hold your hand" about a thousand times in a song, and concluding that the Beatles must have sucked."

Except the Beatles were like a boy band who played their own instruments, put out some okay records, then managed to create experimental yet accessable music that noone had ever conceived of before.

Note that they didn't choose a Public Enemy song. The truth is that you can put out a formulaic rap record with a few turns of phrase denegrating women, B-list celebrities, glorifying violence, recreational drugs, and denegrating acts of sex with woman.

Don't forget to add the obligitory "women shake that ass" song and either a socially consious song or a song apologizing and glorifying your mother.

Anonymous said...

all of you that have taken this personally and as an insult are idiots. it's funny. laugh at it. it's true that these lyrics suck. accept it. it doesn't mean that rap as a genre sucks, it's only pointing out that the vast majority of artists performing within that genre are idiots, much like yourselves.

KingCthulu said...

Congratulations. You've just demonstrated how bad mainstream rap is. Next time I would reccomend labeling it as such, instead of claiming that one white kid's introduction to Biggy Smalls (who is about as mainstream as it gets), counts as any sort of representation of "underground" rap.

Now, if you want to take a genuine look at some good music that shows both instrumental and lyrical dexterity, you're not going to find it in the mainstream of any genre--as the primary purpose of mainstream music is simply to make money.

Corporate-produced rap is not hip-hop. Gangsta rap is not hip-hop. Hip-hop is an entire culture--battling, b-boying, scratching, breaking, etc... so any attempt to distill it by someone unfamiliar will turn up empty-handed.

Now, if you want to genuinely explore the genre with an open mind, and get some examples of good underground music, I have a few suggestions:

-Saul Williams
-Common Market
-The Last Poets
-The Blue Scholars
-Myrz
-Dilated Peoples

That's just a start. There's a whole world out there you haven't even heard of.

Mark said...

"Rap" is actually spelled with a silent first letter...(c)rap. Endless re-makes,covers,sampled music of rock artists - it's like legalized plagiarism, using other people's work to deceive the public into thinking that you're a talented musician. Garbage!! Can't play an instrument, but they're musicians...right.

blex said...

> enjoy this music now is such a
> jackass,

My 16 year old son hates this crap they call music

> it's way worse than Iron man by > black sabaath,

He likes black sabbath (so did I when I was his age!)

> more too bad all your kids want > to be them.

Naw - the rappers are loosing steam, since most of the kids nowadays have seen the total lack of talent of most of these guys!

He wants to be an Engineer - fuck the rapper shit!

krmagley said...

J Stroud,
you're right, Nas didn't win a pulitzer. I'd been told it by enough people that I believed it without looking it up, which was stupid of me. I would say however that the song "I Gave You Power," about a gun lamenting it's fate as a tool for death and destruction is good enough that I never questioned it, is that more Nas "Blather?"
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/nas/igaveyoupower.html

How about the song "What Goes Around" where he condemns drugs, religious ignorance and black on black crime as "poison." http://lyrics.rare-lyrics.com/N/Nas/What-Goes-Around.html

I could go on and on. And that is just Nas. Sweeping generalizations say more about the person making them than they do about the subject being discussed. You can go ahead and discount an entire genre of music but it marginalizes you, not the music.

I'll leave you with my favorite verse ever from a rap song. It's by Cee-Lo Green (now one half of Gnarls Barkley, which is a little too pop-py for my tastes, but oh well) and has nothing to do with hoes, bling, capping or blah blah blah.

"I have millenniums of material and rivers of rhythm
An entire ocean of emotion that's enlightening to swim in
Also a forest of feeling, beaten paths of peace
Trapped inside my silhouette I have to speak to release
Demanding more from the pen than I horde from the pen
The line between playing to win and sin is thin
But I walk it with grace and I talk it with taste
I am that raw, simply put, and I rest my case; it's elementary
Yet far more than resources to pay the rent for me
Everything that I've done is divine
Ask God, he'll tell ya, yeah, he mine
So, you see, you don't need another thug out of me
That is the last thing I plan to be on this LP
But I'ma go slip into something mo' comfortable and continue the lesson
No inconvenience at all, I insist on leaving an impression
So relax, and ride out."

-Cee-Lo Green
One For the Road

Aletheia said...

To add to the "nifty hip-hop" list, there's always Eyedea, Busdriver, Blueprints, and Atmosphere. I despise most mainstream rap, same as I mock trite pop & country lyrics. Usually, one can find worthy stuff in any given genre. That being said... rap translations are hilarious.

soomal said...

Cthulu, you are right. Dilated Peoples kick asses.

Peeps, try listening to real hiphop music.

Dilated Peoples
KRS-One
MF Doom
De La Soul

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krmagley said...

soomal,
I've never cared for MF Doom. Granted my only experience with him is with the Danger Doom album, but I was dissapointed with his lyrics. He's occasionally funny and sometimes his rhymes flow, but it sounds like an extended freestyle. He's talking about something different with every line. You don't have to tell me a story, but at least stay on one subject for a while. with him you can never really answer the question "what's this song about?" I did enjoy the adult swim references though.

R2D2 said...

krmagley, you probably should check some more mf doom lyrics at this blog at http://uhh4d.blogspot.com/2006/08/mf-doom-lyrics.html

this post is actually about how some mainstream rap lyrics are senseless, and how great some underground rap lyrics are.

Anonymous said...

Fuck this, Fuck that, I fuck you, You fuck me, I fuck your bitch... Rap today glorifies sex, drugs and alcohol. The old rappers actually had a good life story to tell.

Anonymous said...

I think i wet my pants.. Gawwwwd that was funny..

Gone are the days when Rap meant something..

Chris said...

What's really wierd is that I actually learned something. Well played, sir.

Bill said...

It never fails that someone will find the way to make hiphop seem negative. It's an art form. I guess if he talked about doing coke and poping pills it would be O.K. Oh no, I got it.....if he holds a guitar and sleeps with 3000 groupies then he's a star.

krmagley said...

bill, you're absolutely right. there are drunken, violent misogynists in every musical genre. there are idiots with horrible lyrics in every musical genre. to point to one and say that it's all that way is wilfully ignorant. there are people who, for one reason or another, don't WANT to like rap. that's fine, i guess, but people shouldn't go making sweeping generalizations like that. it just shows they're stupid, or worse.

Purple Witch said...

Yes, it's just that rappers who "sing" about anything else are few and far between. Also, their lyrics about women are rarely flattering... Stop looking for excuses: is the "art" in the message? Then why does it have to be negative? I understand that people who listen to this trash often grow up in these environments, but is this helping them rise above it, or glamourising the gangsta life?

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the_one said...

Fuck the lyrics..who cares...
Just feel the beat damn!

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More Than Meets The Eye said...

My opinion comes from different aspects, first of all the lyrics are consistent,
I consider this song a classic, B.I.G added an element to rap music, which I feel
has made great progress. I think the creativity of this translation is excellent.
However my opinion may sound one sided, because negative criticism doesn't
lead anywhere, which i don't agree with, though I keep an open mind, which I feel is important to address
each aspect without the attachment factor. The negativity stated to support
arguments is a feeling of disapprobation in the person who considers it, not a
property of the action itself. My opinion most certainty won't be the last one.
I'm sure that is easy to agree with?

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